


House Pride

by StarTheTripleDevil



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Competition, Detention, Energy (Hogwarts Mystery), Female Player Character (Hogwarts Mystery), Good Slytherins, Halloween, Hogwarts Fifth Year, House points, Random in-between chapter, Slytherin, Twitter, Yes I know this is bad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-24
Updated: 2018-11-28
Packaged: 2019-08-28 12:22:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 5,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16723323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarTheTripleDevil/pseuds/StarTheTripleDevil
Summary: Brother missing, friend's sister stuck in a painting, detention in the kitchens, Prefect duties, O.W.L.s approaching - these are all things worrying fifth-year Slytherin Elena Jenkins this year. But with Slytherin having a giant lead in the House Cup, Elena did not expect house points to become one of her worries. But now, she is chosen for a team event, with members of her house facing against others with the goal of earning as many House Points as possible within a short period of time. But as it turns out, Elena's teammates and opponents are not what they seem. As the House Prides continue, Elena begins to question everything she knows about the universe and time itself.Or a story about a Hogwarts Mystery character becoming self-aware.Note: This story will never be finished due to the fact that there has been so much stuff added to Hogwarts Mystery since and the message this story was trying to give is also outdated.





	1. So it Begins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elena tries to go to detention but ends up in a mysterious green void instead.

"And if you think I'm nasty, wait until you get to the Kitchens and meet Pitts..."

Those were the words Filch said before Elena started walking down the stairs. She looked behind one last tine to see the faces of Penny, Bill, Merula and Madam Rakepick before turning back and walking down to the kitchens. Filch followed her to make sure she didn't escape.

As Elena finally got to the entrance to the kitchens, she noticed the entire place seemed to be gone. Not locked. The entire place was just replaced with a green void, getting bigger all the time. Before she knew it, she was entirely surrounded by it. Filch was nowhere to be seen.

"Welcome to House Pride!" a strange voice said. "Do you have what it takes to earn more house points than the opponent? For the next five days, you shall attend as many classes as you can, with the intend of earning as many points as possible. May the best team win!"

Elena looked around. She saw nine other Slytherins. None of them looked familiar to her. Maybe they were new first-years or other students of different years she had rarely seen. It was hard to tell how old they were. They all had the same expression, and were staring in the same direction.

Elena turned around to look at what the others were looking at, and it was a wall with information on the event.

"Slytherin - 0, Hufflepuff - 0"

These were the total standings at the moment, which was not surprising, as the event had just started. Below the house point standings, a reward was shown. The members of the winning team would receive 30 Galleons each, while the losing team would receive 10 Knuts each. There were also individual rewards, based on individual success. The highest prize required earning 200 house points. Elena was a good house point earner, but even to her, earning 200 house points in just five days was impossible.

"I expect you to do your best," the strange voice said. "Go to your classes and do everything you can to make sure you are number one."

A door opened in the void, and suddenly, Elena found herself in a Care of Magical Creatures class.

"Wait, isn't it Saturday?" Elena wondered to herself.

"Alright class, time to learn more about Fire Crabs!" Professor Kettleburn said. Elena was getting a feeling of déjà vu. Didn't this happen in her fourth year? She wasn't entitely sure.


	2. Understanding Nothing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elena doesn't understand what's going on, and every moment seems to be making it even more confusing.
> 
> (Basically a guide how to get energy in Hogwarts Mystery.)

Care of Magical Creatures class started with the class having to locate a smell. Elena felt like they had been searching for this exact same smell in this exact formation many times before.

Elena didn't know why, but she felt like going to sniff others. Even though doing so made her feel like she was draining energy, she felt like it was the only way to find the actual smell and get the class going on.

She started by sniffing Charlie. His scent was like grass and honeysuckle. Next up was Ismelda - actually, she was not going to do that. Next up Merula. Her smell was like cloves and nail polish. Finally, Liz, whose smell was like lake water and hay. Suddenly, Elena knew exactly where the awful smell was, and she picked it up.

Next up was finding food for the Fire Crab. Elena was looking along with Barnaby, Merula and Ismelda. During the search, Elena talked to the other three Slytherins, as she felt this was the only way to find food. However, doing so exhausted her and before she could finish talking to people, she ran out of energy.

While her running out of energy stopped her from talking to others or finding food, it surprisingly did not stop her from leaving the class. Nobody seemed to even care that she left, not even Professor Kettleburn. As she left, she noticed a timer near the class location. "7 hours 56 minutes 34 second remaining" This timer was going down every second.

"Wait, this class is eight hours?" Elena wondered to herself. "I don't remember classes lasting that long before. And why do I even have a class on a Saturday?"

As Elena walked towards the castle, she saw a stick on the ground. She picked it up and as she did that, Fang showed up. Elena threw the stick and Fang went to fetch it. Elena felt like she had gained energy from this.

Elena was walking inside the castle. There were others there, but they didn't seem to be paying any attention to Elena. Elena noticed one of the fires near the entrance of the Great Hall wasn't burning.

"Incendio!" Elena said and got the fire to burn again.

She also noticed something about the knight statues seemed off. She pointed at the sword of one of them, and it gave it to the one next to it. Elena seemed like she gained more energy from these actions.

Elena walked into the Great Hall to eat some more of the giant sandwiches Hogwarts famously served. She did not know why, but she had the urge to sit around the Gryffindor table, near the end on the staff table's side. She sat there, and as she did so, a list of her friends showed up. Elena decided to choose Barnaby. As she did so, Barnaby appeared sitting next to him.

"I've never liked going to class, but I've always loved magical creatures," Barnaby said. "Let's see if you know more about them than me, Elena."

"Wait, what is going on?" Elena asked. "Aren't we supposed to be in Care of Magical Class? Actually, isn't today supposed to be our first Hogsmeade day?"

Barnaby, however, ignored the question. "Which creature is from Africa?" he asked instead.

Africa. Elena started thinking, and three things popped into her head. Phoenix. Flobberworm. Fwooper. Based on what she remembered from Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, Fwoopers were from Africa.

"Fwooper," Elena said, and as she did that, she felt like her friendship with Barnaby was improving. She had no idea how this was happening. Her sense of empathy made the feeling of friendship even stronger.

Barnaby asked more questions, and when he was done, he seemed angry. Despite this, Elena still felt the interaction was a success, and that she and Barnaby were closer friends that before.

Elena still had to get to the kitchens, so she walked down the stairs nearby. She saw the entrance to the kitchens, this time not replaced with a green void. She saw a house-elf taking a nap near the entrance. She woke the elf up and they ran back into the kitchens. Elena tried to follow the elf but something made her unable to do so. It was like an invisible force.

Elena decided to go to her common room instead. She went to her dorm room, where her four pets were sleeping. She woke them up one by one, and gained energy.

Elens decided to explore the castle, as that seemed to be giving her energy instead of making her lose it. She went upstairs, where she found two nearly empty paintings. One of them, the one next to the Charms classroom, had a girl show up and the other, near the Prefects' bathroom, had oranges appear. Both of these actions made her feel more energetic. She also gained energy by encouraging Peeves to cause trouble in the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom.

Next up, downstairs. Elena walked past the library, and saw books on the bench near it. Elena levitated the books to form a nice stack, and felt more energy. But even this wasn't enough. Elena had to leave the castle and explore Hogsmeade and the Forbidden Forest.

In Diagon Alley, she saw a kid about to sled down a hill. Even though Elena did nothing involving this event, she still gained more energy. She also gained energy by scaring away a spider from a web in the Forbidden Forest.

Elena returned to Care of Magical Creatures class. She was confused by what had happened. Nobody had seemed to care that she had been wandering around the castle and even entering the Forbidden Forest. Nobody in class seemed to notice that she had left.


	3. Best House Point Scorer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All Elena needs to do in order to gain House Points is to go to long classes and complete them in a time limit. And they all seem to to specifically for her.
> 
> (And she also finds out about ads.)

After food was found, Elena was given the task to give food to the fire crab, which she did successfully. She felt she was gaining courage by doing so.

Next, Elena had the chance to talk to Charlie. She talked to him, but before she could finish the conversation, she ran out of energy again. And this time, there was no going to Hogwarts to collect energy.

This time, Elena felt something else. She was no longer in Care of Magical Creatures class, but rather a place that wasn't familiar. There were circular birds getting shot at green pigs with slingshots. After around 30 seconds, a voice said "Angry Birds 2". After this, Elena had the chance to try shooting birds with a slingshot. She managed to hit some pigs and as she did so, a number she was seeing kept getting bigger, until she had to stop. She was back in Care of Magical Creatures class again, and felt more energetic that before.

Elena continued to talk to Charlie, and when she ran out of energy again, she went through yet another of these visions. After a few, Charlie asked her a question, and noted it was not about dragons, but it might be about dragons.

"Who is the Transfiguration professor?" Charlie asked.

Why would Charlie be asking such a question? It was too obvious. "Professor McGonagall," Elena answered, and Charlie seemed happy.

Next up, it was time to draw a fire crab. Elena used the vision trick to get some more energy, but before she could finish talking to others about drawings, she ran out of visions as well.

She had one more way of earning instant energy. She saw that she could pay 5 Galleons, 8 Sickles and 15 Knuts to get just enough energy to get through the class instantly, or wait to regain energy. Elena decided it was not worth it to pay, as she still had over seven hours left to finish the class. Instead, Elena decided to wait, and fell asleep in class. Nobody seemed to care.

In her dream, Elena saw an entirely blue bird, followed by various non-moving images of strangers hanging around at Hogwarts. They seemed to have the exact same friends and experiences as Elena herself. In some pictures, Elena saw Rowan in different houses, and sometimes even a male version of her.

After two hours, Elena woke up, and managed to finish class.

"Alright, class is done," Professor Kettleburn said. "10 points for Slytherin, Elena Jenkins!"

"Wait, why am I the only one earning points?" Elena asked, but nobody responded.

"Professor Kettleburn?" Elena asked. No response.

Everyone was standing still, except Barnaby, who was sitting on a rock. Elena decided to leave the classroom, and as she did, she noticed a portal back to the House Pride realm.

The wall now had the faces of the ten Slytherins, as well as their names. Elena was at the top of Slytherin with ten points. Second place went to a guy called Logan, who had managed to gain five points so far. The bottom five all had 0 points. Overall, Hufflepuff was leading the House Pride 32-21.

Elena noticed the 9 team members standing behind her, doing nothing but starting at the wall.

"We need to do better, team," Elena said. "You're real Slytherins, aren't you? A real Slytherin is always determined to be the best!"

Elena followed to a Flying Class, where she had to take care of brooms with Rowan, Merula and Penny. However, Elena noticed she had started the class with no energy, so she couldn't do anything. She decided to fall asleep, and woke up every two hours to advance the class.

Elena continued to complete classes, and gained ten house points for every class completion. However, she was still unable to enter the kitchens, and outside time didn't seem to pass at all.


	4. Slytherin Wins!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elena's efforts have put Slytherin at the top! Winning what seems to be the top price of House Pride. But there is more to come.

When deciding to explore Hogwarts while taking classes, Elena noticed energy spots refreshed after some time. Out of her pets, her owl seemed to fall asleep the most frequently, so she decided to carry it with her wherever she went.

When the House Pride was over, Elena had single-handedly msnaged to earn over 100 House Points. That was impressive, but not enough for the 200-poimt reward. The Slytherin house had managed to win the event 420-408.

"Yay! We won! We won the House Pride!" Elena cheered as she got 30 Galleons. "I don't know what this was about, but it's over now. I guess this means going back to normal."

Elena decided to tell Rowan about this victory, but by the time she got to the Slytherin Common Room, she had no memory of the event happening. All she noticed was that Slytherin had somehow gained a hundred points out of nowhere. But now it was actually time for detention in the kitchens.

Except it was not. Suddenly, Elena found herself trapped in yet another green void.

"Welcome back to another House Pride!" the same voice announced. "This time, Slytherins and Gryffindors will be competing for this coat with falling leaves. Are you up for the challenge? Also, for individual rewards, you can win notebooks, which can be used to buy illegal pets, which you can safely keep in your dorm room without anyone but Hagrid knowing."

Suddenly, Elena remembered everything about the first house pride. "Not fair! We already won House Pride!"

"Too bad," the voice said. "Now compete in this. And also, you must arrange a birthday party for Hagrid!"

"Didn't I already do that four years ago?" Elena asked.

"Do it now or it didn't happen," the voice commanded. "If you fail to do it, everyone's memory of the event will be erased! You have three days for the birthday party and five for House Pride. These timers overlap and helping with the birthday party won't give you house points! Have fun!"


	5. Celebrating Hagrid's Birthday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elena has to re-experience her past to make sure it actually happened. But while she does that, she notices that several things are off.

Elena felt so annoyed by this. She had to go all the way to the past to make sure Hagrid's birthday happened. In the past, she talked to Dumbledore, and while talking to him, got to talk to Ben, Penny and Merula too.

"I bet Dumbledore will give you yet another 100 House Points!" Merula said. Elena stopped for a while. Wasn't the first time she earned 100 House Points after Hagrid's birthday in her first year?

She continued to plan the party by talking to people such as Rowan, Madam Hooch, Professor Flitwick and even Filch. They all agreed to come to the party. She also convinced Professor McGonagall to come after defeating an unbelievably weak sixth-year in a duel.

After inviting various people, Elena got to babysit Fang, the dog she would only name a year later, referred to by its name by both Hagrid and Dumbledore.

Her biggest challenge was inviting Snape. As she tried to ask Snape to come, he asked her a question. "How many more years will I be forced to tolerate your presence, Jenkins?"

Elena decided to use her supposed time travel to her advantage. "I'm a fifth-year, so two more."

"Two too many," Snape commented. Oddly enough, Snape seemed to agree with the answer instead of insulting her for claiming to be in a higher year and trying fool him or something like that.

Snape still agreed to come. This meant all that was left was talking to Amos Diggory and choosing a magical creature as a gift. Elena chose the Porlock. Hagrid was very happy with the party.

The party was over. Back to House Pride.


	6. R'S IDENTITY DISCOVERED! - NOT CLICKBAIT! (almost cried)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We interrupt this story for a totally valid theory - well, it has so much evidence that it's practically a fact - about R's identity!

R's identity is...

Actually, before reading this, make sure you have a Prefect badge with you.

Because this a perfect theory.

Ha ha ha! Get it? Barnaby made that joke?

Anyway, let's get to the point.

But what are points?

Points, as in house points?

House Pride?

Is R the cause of House Prides?

Maybe, but we can't jump to conclusions that quickly.

R.

Is there a mysterious figure in video gaming with a name starting with R?

Well, yes there is.

But how do we find them?

I have no idea.

But we need to take a look at all we know about R.

R killed Duncan Ashe.

This means R is a murderer.

That is a key word.

But there is still more.

R is in the Harry Potter universe.

But what else is in the Harry Potter universe?

Aberforth Dumbledore's goat patronus.

But why would Aberforth Dumbledore's goat patronus be important to figuring out R's identity?

Well, as we know, goats are iconic characters in video games.

Like the Dreemurrs in Undertale.

Wait. Dreemurr. Undertale. It's all an anagram.

The keyword of murderer rearranges to Dreemurr.

And which anagram of a Dreemurr is in which anagram of Undertale?

Ralsei in Deltarune.

Ralsei is R confirmed.

 

But wait!

In There Is No Game, it's said that the goat is a lie.

So R is not a goat, but the game wants us to think R is one.

The cake is a lie.

It's a piece of cake refers to stuff that's easy.

But if the cake is a lie, does that mean that nothing is easy?

Wait, that's it.

R can't be someone obvious, like a person whose name starts with the letter R.

But let's get back to Aberforth.

We know Aberforth has an R in his first name.

So do Ariana, Percival, Kendra and Aurelius.

But guess who doesn't?

Albus!

Isn't it suspicious that he's the only member of the Dumbledore family who doesn't have the letter R in their first name?

I thought so!

So is Albus Dumbledore R?

I mean, who else is at Hogwarts, extremely powerful, and can even threaten Rakepick?

But wait!

If Albus Dumbledore brought Rakepick to Hogwarts to investigate, why would he later send a threatening letter to her?

Because he actually didn't mean those threats and just wanted it to appear that way because he knew MC and the others would find the message and as such not suspect him of being R!

 

Albus Dumbledore is R confirmed!

(Also, all of his middle names and his last name all have exactly one R.)


	7. I don't even know what to name this chapter but here MC gets the jacket

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elena spends the remaining time on House Pride and manages to have Slytherin beat Gryffindor by 10 points. And then she's sent back in time in Year 5 for unexplained reasons.

Finally, Hagrid's birthday was over. Now it was time to focus on House Pride again. Time to complete 8-hour-classes and make Slytherin proud, once and for all. Actually, the term "once and for all" isn't really fitting here.

Elena participated in some classes and blah blah blah lazy writing I know

It was a tight competition. In fact, it was so close that the house points of every member counted. Slytherin won 1053-1043. Slytherins got the coat.

As for individual rewards, there was no way Elena was getting the top reward. Even if she had ignored Hagrid's birthday, it would have been impossible. The second to best reward was something she managed to achieve.

Now, Elena was wearing her coat with falling leaves, finally ready to have detention in the kitchens, when Penny ran to her.

"Elena, I found Beatrice in a portrait!" Penny shouted.

"Yeah, I know," Elena said, but she was ignored. She followed Penny to the Grand Staircase, where she saw Beatrice stuck in a painting the same way as before these House Prides. She had the same conversations with the portraits of Sir Cadogan and Merlin, and Rakepick told her about the same conclusion involving a Cursed Vault. And Filch showed up again and told her to go to the kitchens again.

Elena walked down the stairs. Maybe this time, he could finally access the kitchens.


	8. Better Be Legit Detention This Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, Elena can go to detention. But now, it seems like a familiar person is a stranger.

Elena walked towards the kitchens, and to her surprise, she could actually enter. As she walked in, she saw some students, including Jae Kim, a Gryffindor in her year.

Elena did some work for Pitts. Of course, Pitts demanded her to make giant sandwiches. What else?

After the sandwiches were done, Elena went to talk to Jae.

"Don't worry about Pitts," he said. "He hates everything that isn't a massive sandwich. I'm Jae Kim."

Elena wasn't sure why Jae was introducing himself when the two had already talked in Defence Against the Dark Arts.

"Nice to meet you, Jae," Elena said instead of questioning what was going on. "I'm Elena Jenkins."

"What are you in for, Elena?" Jae asked.

Jae and Elena continued talking, and nothing strange was going on. Elena got to befriend Jae and Badeea Ali. During the next visit to Hogsmeade, Elena went to drink butterbeer with Jae. On a regular afternoon, she played Gobstones with Badeea, and won by boring her. Along with eating sandwiches, these were the best ways to get close to new friends.

As October started, Dumbledore decided to hold the biggest Hallowe'en Feast ever. He invented students to carve pumpkins and prepare decorations in the Great Hall. Elena went there with Rowan, Bill, Penny and that struggling Gryffindor kid from Charms class.

Everything seemed to well. No signs of House Prides. The universe seemed to be restoring to normal. House Pride was nowhere to be seen.


	9. Ew, a Spider!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hallowe'en seems to be going fine until Elena is placed into yet another House Pride. This time, it's between all four houses and how they do determines whether Elena is stuck with a spider on her bed or a haunting orange circle of new announcements.

Everything was going well. Or so it seemed. As Elena left the Great Hall after preparing decorations for the 15th time, Elena was pulled into yet another green void.

"This again?" Elena asked angrily. "We already won two House Prides! We're leading the House Cup! What more do you want?"

"Welcome to House Pride!" the announcement voice greeted Elena and the nine expressionless Slytherins staring at a wall.

"This time, you get to win this cute little spider," the voice said. "Isn't it adorable? Every time you leave the class, you're forced to see a picture of this spider. Arachnophobia? Too bad! Win this spider, or else every time you change your clothes, you will be haunted with an orange circle as a constant reminder that you're missing the spider! Also, whether you get the spider depends on team effort, or in other words, how well the random people you're placed with do. Sounds great? Good. Let the House Pride begin!"

Elena took a look at the individual rewards. There were various money and notebook rewards available, and, of course, getting the final one was impossible.

Elena left to complete some classes. During her times of sleeping, she saw more visions of a completely blue bird, others replacing her, different House and male versions of Rowan, and most notably, complaints about House Pride.

People were complaining how they were placed with random people, and relying on pure luck to either get or not get the spider.

Elena started wondering who the others on her team really were. They weren't people she knew from Hogwarts. Her points were the only ones actually affecting the real House Cup.

Elena tried to communicate with the other Slytherins in her team, but she failed. As she was in the green void, she noticed a portal to another green void, this time with her name, placement in the House Cup and some numbers referring to things she didn't understand. Elena touched her name, and suddenly she had the chance to change it. Elena changed her first name to "Hello there". She returned to the House Pride area and saw that her first name had been replaced with that. However, nobody reacted to that. Elena went to change her name back to normal.

Elena saw even more complaints about House Pride. As she read what others had to say, she noticed they accused their opponents of being something known as bots. Elena didn't know what that word meant (I mean, they're wizards, they wouldn't know what bots are) but based on people's complaints, that meant they weren't actual humans.

So, Elena was stuck in a weird competition against opponents who weren't real people. And to make thing worse, Slytherin was in fourth place, and Elena was in first place in Slytherins.

"Hey, you bots!" Elena screamed at the other Slytherins, but with no response. "Do something! Don't just stand there! Earn more House Points!"

Elena took a look at the wall again. All of her teammates were shown there, with a "REPORT" text above each of their face. Elena decided to report Penelope, the one in last place. What happened was that her name changed into Audrey, but her appearance stayed the same.

As the event was over, her team placed fourth. No spider.

Elena went to change her clothes and of course, there was an announcement of a spider. It said to wait for opportunities to get it.

Some time later, a new announcement came. It told her to pay some kind of Muggle money to get the spider, and that this was the last chance. Elena did not do so. Even when this opportunity was over, the reminder of the spider was still there. Why was the world giving such contradicting information on a potential pet?


	10. The Mixing of Past and Present

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Did the past really happen? Do things happen in chronological order? Now your previously complete past is incomplete.

Everything was getting crazier. Suddenly, Elena found herself in the Great Hall, talking to Penny, unsure what year it was. Something made Elena feel like it was her first year.

Elena experienced a weird Hallowe'en with werewolves. She befriended a werewolf girl called Chiara Lobosca, searched for werewolves with Cecil Lee and defeated werewolf Fenrir Greyback in a duel. Penny also remembered her encounter with a werewolf, but that was only after her first year.

Elena was unsure what this was all about, but she had a werewolf capture unit uniform now.

Some time later, a Duelling Club was announced.

"Win enough duels, and you learn the ability to cast the Melofors Jinx!" a voice announced. "This is one of your Year 1 spells!"

"I'm already a fifth-year," Elena said. "I finished my first year years ago! Why should this spell be part of my first year spells!"

"Because that's how this game works," the voice said. "I mean that is how Duelling Club works. Now go face others!"

Elena was doing well, and this rate, it seemed likely she would win the Jinx. But as the event approached its end, Elena only had three tries left. She lost them all. She paid some Galleons and lost again. Money wasted for nothing.

"Ugh!" Elena complained. "This event is nothing but a big scam!"

Elena got even more visions of the blue bird and alternate reality versions of herself. Why were the people in her place the only completely different ones? Why weren't the others replaced? Well, except Rowan, who kept changing her gender and house.

Elena missed having normal school instead of House Prides and timeline messes.


	11. Oh, no more House Prides? That's good.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elena believes there are no more House Prides. The universe almost restores to normal.

It was the day after Hallowe'en. No sign of spiders. No sign of House Pride. The world could finally continue.

Elena started becoming her old Hogwarts self again. Slowly, her memories of House Prides started fading as they didn't fit to this otherwise consistent universe.

 

But then the Fire Nation attacked! And by Fire Nation, I mean Jam City. And by attacking, I mean making another House Pride. Of course, Elena did not know there was a thing called Jam City.

This time, the House Pride was about getting some shirt with some purple beam. And it was against Ravenclaw. Right as the House Pride started, Elena got her memories of inconsistent time back, as well as her feeling of hatred towards it.

"That's it!" Elena screamed angrily at the announcer. "I'm no longer participating in this stupid event! I'm boycotting this universe mess up!"

"You can't do that," the voice said. "Everything you do to boycott us is only your loss, not ours. That's what resisting is so useless."


	12. Panic! at Hogwarts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elena panics over the mess of the universe. Suddenly, it's 1985 again and Elena meets members of the soon-to-be rock band, the Weird Sisters. To make things even weirder, Orsino Thruston is attending Hogwarts at 9 and nobody seems to have a problem with that.

Yet another House Pride. Elena was so angry, she decided not to touch any classes, and instead, she slept in the House Pride void. During this time, she saw more visions of the blue bird realm. There were countless alternate reality versions of her protesting the House Pride. All of these complaints included the word #HogwartsMystery. Elena did not know what the symbol # meant, or why everyone used the exact same words. Must have been a code.

A few days later, people were announcing that you could now meet the Weird Sisters. Elena did not know who they were, but she decided to check it out since it wasn't a House Pride.

Elena walked to the Clocktower Courtyard, where she saw three boys dressed in rock clothes. It was night, and Elena had no idea what day or year it was.

"Who are you?" Elena asked the three boys.

"We're the Weird Sisters," the guy in the middle introduced himself. "My name is Myron Wagtail, and I'm the lead singer. This is Orsino Thruston, our drummer. And here's Kirley Duke, our lead guitarist. He rarely speaks. Anyway, you're Elena Jenkins, right?"

"Yes," Elena responded. "How do you know?"

"Everyone knows about you," Myron said. "And we're big fans of you following that time you went to the Cursed Vault. I think you could help us with a song."

"Why?" Elena asked. "I mean, I just met you. And this is crazy."

"I love crazy," Orsino said.

"No," Elena said. "I've gone through a lot of timeline messes recently. Must be because of the Cursed Vaults. I've been to various years in the past month or so and I'm just so tired of it."

"Don't worry," Myron said. "You're back in good old 1985."

"1985!" Elena screamed in panic. "This is impossible! It's supposed to be 1988!"

"So, a Vault sent you back in time," Myron said. "We'll help you get back to the future if you help us with our performance."

"Fine," Elena said. "But since you know so much about me, I want to know something in return. Like what year you're in. I don't remember seeing you here before."

"Fine, I'm a fifth-year," Myron said. "Kirley is in his fourth year." Kirley looked in a way that seemed like agreement.

"What about Orsino?" Elena asked.

"Well, he was born in 1976 so..." Myron started.

"So he's a nine-year-old," Elena said. "He's a nine-year-old attending Hogwarts!"

"Aren't we all a bunch of nine-year-olds?" Orsino asked.

"No," Elena said. "I'm pretty sure you're supposed to get your Hogwarts acceptance letter at 11. I guess the Hogwarts staff must have messed up at counting at one point, considering they send countless letters every year."

"Let's not worry about inconsistencies and instead focus on the upcoming performance," Myron said.

"I guess you're right," Elena said.


	13. Everything is Awful!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything is bad when you're part of a team. Everything is awful when you're in House Pride.

The Weird Sisters quest happened pretty much the way it did in Hogwarts Mystery.

During some gaps, Elena got more visions of the blue bird land, which was apparently called Twitter. And the complaints? Those were written in tweets.

There were more complaints about House Pride. There were also complaints about having House Pride overlap with a limited time side quest, aka the Weird Sisters quest.

When would everything start to make sense? Maybe it never did. Does anything ever make sense?

 


	14. Winning with No Effort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elena continues to do nothing but still wins. And this fanfic continues to be low effort but I have to do it for the important message.

The House Pride continued, and Elena continued not to take classes because she wanted to boycott the whole thing. She saw more visions of this Twitter. Everyone there was angry too.

"WE HATE HOUSE PRIDES!" everyone tweeted.

The official Hogwarts Mystery announced that there was a contest where they could become the mobile game of the year. Elena didn't understand some of this, but was it really true? Was all she ever knew just a game? Not real?

"If you win, will you promise to never do House Prides again?" a tweet asked. That tweet had Elena's picture on it, and it was by someone called Some Slytherin Student. Was that the person playing as Elena?

Everything was a lie!

Soon, House Pride ended.

"Congratulations on winning, Slytherins!" the voice announced. "Here, have this shirt!"

"Really?" Elena asked angrily. "So when I put in a lot of effort for the spider, I lose, but when I put in no effort at all, I win? This is how it works? If so, I will continue to not do anything during House Prides at all."

"You should rethink your strategy," the voice said.

"Why?" Elena asked.

"Because for individual rewards, you get the chance to win red notebooks," the voice said. "It will be the only way to get magical creatures."

"Really, you're doing another House Pride even though everyone hates it?"

"Yes!" the voice said. "Of course we will! Making our users dissatisfied is our job. We're Jam City!"


End file.
